Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Search Engine Wrong Numbers (and Crank Calls, Too!)

It has been a while since our last installment of Search Engine Wrong Numbers, So I have built up quite a number of items worthy of mention.

The first of which is that my brother decided at some point to intentionally search for this site using search terms that would be sure to attract my attention. The most obvious of these searches was a Google search for:
"frank gibson will be blogging about this on his daily blog of the day"

It's a bit wordy, but it did pull up my page! There were several other searches for:
  1. "frank gibson"
  2. "frank gibson blogger"
  3. "frank gibson daily blog"
These may have also been Jeremy's doing, but it has not been worth my time to check them all.

(NOTE: If you readers (all twelve of you) each do a search for "Frank Gibson", and search through the listing for one of MY pages, ignoring the other results, it will increase my ranking among the Frank Gibsons of the world. (As of this posting, I show up on page 23 of the results). There is a wardrobe consultant, a painter, a photographer, a drummer, a webcartoonist, and several others with my name who are more famous than me, AND there is also a man from Nashville, TN, who is president of the Tennessee Coalition for Open Government, who comes up before me.)

I got a search from the Saudi Arabian National Internet Service looking for
"gramar corection"

Ha! I laughed! Silly Saudi, of course you need to be looking for grammar correction if you can't spell the word "Grammar" OR "Correction"! A week or so later, an American computer also looked for
"grammar corection"

then a couple of days later,
"grammer corection"

Man, I thought, Everybody who is looking for a grammar corection site can't spell! 2 out of 3 of them misspelled "grammar" and they All misspelled the word "Correction"!

...The same way.

...and when they misspelled it they got my site, which means....

I must have misspelled it on my site.

Sure enough, a search within my site for the word "corection" came up with my July Fourth post entitled: Reader Response - Mr. Grammar Corection Nazi

Well, now I feel a little foolish. In a post ABOUT being a stickler for detail about the English language, I misspelled the word "correction" in the title, and it stayed that way for months! I feel like I just got back home from a party to find out that I had food stuck in my mustache the whole time. I wondered why everyone had been furiously rubbing at their upper lips!

Some other noteworthy search terms were...

  • "girlfight" (I'm guessing this guy left disappointed when he found out it was actually just a popularity contest between Betty Boop and Smurfette!)
  • "taxi driver soundtrack" if he actually liked this soundtrack, he probably wasn't looking for my take on the movie Taxi Driver
  • "move so fast you can't be seen" I didn't actually use these words in my post on the age old question of flight versus invisibility but when my friend Chesman commented, he chose this, the overlooked third option. Looks like he has some company.
  • "old nashville, tn prison where the movie green mile was filmed" I actually only mentioned the church where a scene from The Green Mile was filmed, in my post about my favorite movies of all time, so if this searcher wanted to know about the prison, he was barking up the wrong website.
  • "jeremy chesman" When I first got my statcounter traffic tracker account, I named names of people I had been able to deduce were visiting my site. Unfortunately for this searcher, "Jeremy" is my brother's first name, and "Chesman" is a totally different guy's last name. Looking for Jeremy Chesman? Sorry, Wrong Number!
  • "kind of energy" this searcher from Brazil probably wanted actual information about alternative energy, not humorous comments about NPR and classic Sci-Fi novels. Sorry, there are plenty of alternative energy sites out there, this just ain't one. Wrong Number, Pal!
And I have saved the very best one for last. I don't know what in the world this guy was looking for, but if this search didn't lead you to my site, I would be very upset indeed. A guy from England wanted to know...
"what are the bad points of a bottle of sprite"
well, I hope he found out.

Good day, readers, and Happy Rosh Hashana/Jewish New Year!

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