Tuesday, July 10, 2007

Movie Tuesday - "Man of the Year", and "The Departed"

Hi Readers!

It's that time of the week again! Time for the Weekly Haiku Movie Review ™ of the Week! This week we take a moment to examine Man of The Year and The Departed.

Man Of The Year - 2 out of 6 stars

This movie was an overall disappointment. It couldn't decide if it was a political satire, a romantic comedy, or a suspense thriller. The worst elements of all of them were there. The acting was as good as it could be given the terrible, terrible script, but even a great actor (and I really like Laura Linney) can't make a ridiculously unbelievable situation believable.

Robin Williams pulls out Moldy-Oldy jokes like the one about about Mama Cass and Karen Carpenter (If they'd only shared that ham sandwich they'd both be alive today), and even tells jokes that he has already used on film in his other movies!
“God must have an odd sense of humor to put an amusement park so close to a waste disposal area”
-Robin Williams as Andrew Martin in Bicentennial Man
"People say Intelligent Design, we must teach Intelligent Design! Look at the human body, is that intelligent? You have a waste processing plant next to a recreation area!"
-Robin Williams as Tom Dobbs in Man of the Year
------- Haiku Movie Review ™ -------
Have you heard the one
About the Politician?
Yeah, I thought you had.
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If you are a Fan of political comedy, a la The Daily Show, don't watch this movie.

Come to think of it, if you are NOT a fan of the Daily Show, don't watch this movie either.



The Departed - 5 out of 6 stars.

Wow! Strap yourself in for this one! This movie knows exactly what it is; It's a violent, edgy, foul-mouthed, spooky, star-packed, cat-and-mouse suspenseful crime drama as apparently only Martin Scorsese can do. If you watch it like I did, with absolutely no idea what to expect, the first fifteen minutes of the movie are a whizz of fast cutting from one scene to another, moving forward through about fifteen years of exposition in fifteen minutes of film. Like I said, strap yourself in.

This movie made me think. About judging people, about true heroism, about compromise, about how I never, ever, want to move to Boston. I found myself wishing after the movie that there could really be anyone in this world as brave and heroic as William Costigan Jr.

Mark Wahlberg, in his role as Staff-Sergeant Dignam, the most vulgar, antisocial, and obnoxious human being on the face of the earth, gets to deliver some of the movie's most memorable lines. Unfortunately, I can't repeat a single one of them in mixed company. Here, edited for decency, is one of his short exchanges.

Dignam:(annoyed at the surveillance cameras' "blind spot") This is unbelievable.. who put the [bleep]ing cameras in this place?

Camera Tech: Whoa, who the [bleep] are you?

Dignam: (leaning in close) I'm the guy who does his job; You must be the other guy.

------- Haiku Movie Review ™ -------
The Cops and Killers
Both have Traitors Among Them,
Who will get Sniffed Out?

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If you are wide awake and ready to sit on the edge of your seat for awhile, pop The Departed into the ol' DVD player. You'll be glad you did.

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