The Joy of Meat!

OK, One last thing about my Chattanooga trip last Saturday!

After Buying the Cheapest High Quality Sneakers on the Face of the Earth, I met my wife for some lunch at a place we had been wanting to check out for months.

Sugar's Ribs, on Missionary Ridge in Chattanooga, has a cute name, and an approximately 25-foot-tall sign next to their building featuring what I can only assume is their namesake mascot, "Sugar", a smiling, pleasantly-plump, African-American waitress carrying a heaping tray full of BBQ ribs. Whether this waitress is a hypothetical construct, like Mrs. Butterworth, or actually based on a real person, Like Wendy, from the Dave Thomas restaurant of the same name, I do not know. I do know that "Sugar" does not own the restaurant, nor did she cook my meal when I was there. (Clicky the linky at the beginning of this paragraph to see what I am talking about.)

As you take I-24 east past downtown Chattanooga, you cannot help but notice the restaurant and huge sign, which are located on the ridge facing the interstate and downtown in such a way as to be only slightly less prominent that the famous "Hollywood" sign in Los Angeles.

Nearly every time my wife and I would pass the place, one of us would say something like "Y'know, one of these days we need to stop in there and check that place out", while we continued driving to the Collegedale Airport, which is where we were usually going.

Well Saturday, I finally took the bull by the... ribs, and when Becca called me (while I shopped for shoes) to tell me that her meeting was done way early, I told her to get a ride to Sugar's, where I would meet her for lunch.
And, Boy! I am glad I did! The Brisket I had that day was, quite simply, the best piece of dead livestock I have ever run across my taste buds. Hands down.

Some of you reading this, if you are a really fortunate person, have had the good luck to eat at Sticky Fingers, the small chain Ribhouse which serves "Memphis-Style" ribs that are exceptional. If you haven't had the pleasure of eating at a Sticky Fingers, I suggest that, the next time you find yourself in the Southeastern United States, you check and see if there is one near you. The Memphis Dry-Rubbed ribs they serve are extraordinarily, eyes-roll-up-in-the-back-of-your-head delicious, and the Peach Cobbler available for dessert ain't bad, neither!

But the Brisket I had at Sugar's was even better than that! Seared on the outside just enough, and so tender that, not only did you not need a knife to eat it, you didn't even need teeth! I probably could have sucked it up with a drinking straw! I'm talking seriously tender meat, here!
My wife had the half-chicken, which you can watch cook while you are ordering it, and it was awfully good too, if you are in a white-meat mood. Next time I go, and there will be a next time, I will probably get the ribs, or the pulled pork, just to compare. But I expect to be disappointed, because I can't imagine a more satisfying carnivorous experience than the one I got on Saturday.

A List, For Your Perusal

I didn't just stop blogging for a while there last week. I stopped looking at my stats, too. so when I first checked back in I was surprised to find these results. For convenience I have grouped them by type. There are a few oddball terms in there, that I will have to explore further. For now, make of this chart what you will.

My Busy Chattanooga Saturday: The Threequel!

After leaving the book reading at ChattaCon (or as my Dad thinks it should have been called, ComicNooga) I still had a few hours to kill (or so I thought). As I mentioned in part two of this tale, I headed back toward McKay's Bookstore from the Con, but I didn't actually head back to McKay's. As I had left the bookstore earlier that morning I spotted a Steve and Barry's location on the other side of the Interstate.

I had heard about these guys when looking for the much-hyped Starbury athletic shoe, the worlds first $15 Athletic Shoe, designed for, endorsed by, and even worn on the court by NBA Basketball Player, Stephon Marbury of the New York Knicks. For more about the Starbury, you can check out this article: Unfortunately, when I had been doing the looking, the nearest Steve and Barry's location was in Atlanta, the trip to which, given the gas prices at the time, might well have tripled the price of the shoe. So, excited to see an outlet in my neck of the woods, I popped in to check out the $15 footwear.

Fifteen dollars is an absurdly inexpensive price for quality athletic shoes, and it just so happened to be the amount I had been paid just a couple of hours before for my box of unwanted paperbacks and old DVD's. So imagine my surprise, my shock, even, when I walked in to the outer vestibule to be greeted with 2 large banners declaring "Winter Liquidation: Everything In The Store $8.98"!!

I looked immediately for the asterisk.

I could find no asterisk.

I still assumed that shoes were excluded. After all, every sale we ever had back when I worked in a retail clothing store always excluded shoes. But then again, we always had an asterisk, too.

I found the Starbury shoe Aisle, and sure enough, the signage proclaimed that the laughably low price of $8.98 applied to ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING in the store.* I still wondered where the catch was. The catch was, they had every style available in sizes 12, 13,14, and 15. I usually take about an 8-1/2, but have been known to wear anything from a 9-1/2 down to a 7. Yeah, I have little girl feet. You want to make somethin' of it?

I once, while working as a camp counselor, offered my extra pair of shoes to a 5th-grader who had for gotten to bring along "creek-stomping" shoes and was understandably reluctant to drag his new, $100-plus, Air Force Ones or Air Jordans, or whatever they were, through a mile and a half of Tennessee creek bed. The 5th grader could not wear my shoes. My shoes were too small. One of the other kids had a pair large enough for him.

Anyway, after scouring the racks for shoes in the Sub-sasquatchian sizes (say that three times fast!), I found a pair that fit pretty well. I dropped a $10 bill for them, and got back change. They survived a hectic night of waiting tables, and as of this morning, they have passed the Gas station Stand-behind-a-counter-all-night test, too. If you follow the S&B link above to go look at the shoes, I got the low-top Starbury II, in black. It was also available in bright blue, and even brighter orange, but I already have a perfectly good pair of clown shoes.

*Seriously. Everything. I just wanted to throw in an asterisk**

**Actually, I didn't look at everything in the store, so I can't swear that an exception didn't exist somewhere, just to make a liar out of me. Also, I will assume that cash registers, store lighting fixtures, and most of the employees were not available for this price. They should have had an asterisk, after all.

Costumed Geeks Part 2: I Conned Chattacon.

As promised, this is the continued adventure of my Saturday in Chattanooga. Part 1 is here.

After dropping off my wife at the airport a few miles north of Choo-Choo-Town, I waited for McKay's to open, and received a little over 15 bucks for my crate-o'-junk. I then had about 45 minutes to make it to the convention before 10am eastern. (9am by my watch.) After getting lost (twice) around downtown, I got there just barely in time. I found the convention center, but instead of finding the registration booth (Where I would find out whether or not I could afford to get in), I instead found the reading, about to get started.

So I walked in and sat down. Nobody kicked me out due to lack of convention badge. With my poor complexion, ponytail, and official San Diego ComicCon Swag Bag, I certainly looked like I belonged there. I got to listen to the reading, which was quite good, while sitting to the immediate left of an overweight 40-something lady wearing a Hogwart's School Robe. After the reading I got my copy of "The Sorcerers' Plague" signed, chatted with Mr. Coe for a few minutes, and then set out to find the registration table.

As it turned out, I couldn't afford to go to ChattaCon. And after taking a look around, I wasn't sure I really wanted to go to ChattaCon. The only thing it appeared that my 50-dollar registration would get me was in to the Dealers' room, where I could then spend even more money that I didn't have. So I went and paid the three dollars for the parking garage, and took off back toward McKay's, from whence I had come. There were lots of Artists displaying their works at the Con, But I felt like the biggest Con Artist of them all.

There is more to tell about my Saturday in Chatt-Town, but it will have to wait until another day. Look for Part 3 tomorrow, in which I will tell you where to get Awesome (and Cheap) Shoes, And some of the Best Barbecued Brisket on the Planet.

Birthdays, Books, and Costumed Geeks.

The Rumours of my Death have been Greatly Exaggerated.

Not dead, just busy. Here's what with.

My Birthday - I turned 30 this Wednesday, but was quite surprised to have a (quite elaborate) party sprung on me on Sunday. My Dad and Both Uncles (on his side) shared the same oxygen in my presence for the first time since their mother's funeral a decade or more ago. Much fun was had by all, and I received a bunch of toys as presents which were appropriate for a "birthday boy" half my age, or younger. I also received "Bananagrams", a game previously known to me as "Boardless Scrabble", but with a more banana-centric theme, and packaged in an easily transportable, banana-shaped pouch. It is a lot of fun, either solitaire or with one or more opponents.

Books - I was blissfully ignorant of the preparations for the above-mentioned party because I was up to my eyeballs in "Forever Odd" by Dean Koontz, the sequel to my current Favorite Book Ever - Odd Thomas . I read most of "Odd Thomas" on the plane ride back from my San Diego Vacation, and read the rest of it the following morning at my Folks' house. It is the best novel I have read in ... well, ever! I honestly cannot recommend this book enough. I have within the last week read both the sequels, "Forever Odd" and "Brother Odd". My Brother-in-law, Jeff, who was the person responsible for introducing me to Terry Pratchett's Discworld, put me on to the "Odd Thomas" series, and has scored another solid point toward being my fiction Guru. Unfortunately, I still have the "Thursday Next" books in his "losses" column, so his score is not perfect. Anyway, you should definitely read "Odd Thomas" before you die. If you don't get around to it, then read it after you die.

Chattacon - I opened the Chattanooga Times-Free Press the other morning to find that their "Weekend" section had a feature devoted to ChattaCon, Chattanooga's answer to The Mega-Events "Comic-Con" in San Diego, and "Dragon*Con" in Atlanta. The cover of this section featured people who were even older than me (and I just officially turned old, people!) dressed as a Star Wars Rebel fighter of some kind, a Pirate Wench of some kind, and, totally inexplicably between the two, the Burger King from the recent ads for the fast food joint of the same name. The Burger King, people? Really? Seeing this picture I had no desire to do any more than mock the "Poor Man's Comic-Con". I had no desire to go.

Then at about 4am this morning, I checked the blog reader on my cellphone, and found out that local author David B. Coe, whose books I recently plugged on this site, was going to be doing a reading there this morning. When I found out that Becca needed to go to Chattanooga early this morning, I decided I would tag along and see if I could pop in to ChattaCon long enough to get Mr. Coe's latest book signed. I popped a couple of other potentially autographable books in my official ComicCon San Diego "swag-bag" that I have been using since my Brother gave it to me when I visited, and also grabbed a milk crate full of books I had been wanting to sell to McKay's, the used book megastore in Chattanooga.

I have to go to work now, and my wife is staring a hole into the back of my neck, so I will continue this story in part 2, later.

I Can Haz Daily blog of Day?

Today, in keeping with my recent tradition of being too busy to post anything of worth, I have decided to outsource my writing to some cats. For only a few grams of catnip these little dudes will write anything! I didn't get a chance to proofread it, though, so if there are any spelling errors, just let it be.. they're cats, OK, not English professors! They don't even have thumbs, what did you expect?!

Enjoy.

Has Anybody Here Seen My Old Friend Martin?

I've found myself thinking a lot about The Reverend Martin Luther King, Jr. today.

His Birthday (not the "observed" holiday, engineered to ensure long weekends for office workers, but the actual anniversary of his birth) is tomorrow, January the 15th. That makes him a Capricorn, for what it's worth.

Mr King was born in 1929. He would be turning 79 years old tomorrow, if he were alive. Let's put that in perspective for you.

Martin Luther King, were he still alive today would be Two years younger than Eartha Kitt, who is still recording music and starred in a movie with Vanessa Wiliams, which was released just a few months ago, in may 2007. Ms. Kitt's Batman Costar, Adam West, is also older than Mr. King.

First Lady Rosalyn Carter is also among Rev. King's contemporaries still among the living. Also just a few months older than King are:

• Noam Chomsky
• Jack Kevorkian
• Bo Diddley

I am sure there is a joke hiding in there somewhere. Feel free to write the punchline yourself.

Just a few months younger than King are actors Ed Asner and Christopher Plummer, Architect Frank Gehry, all of whom are still working at the age of 78.

And here's the creepy one. Only 10 months younger than MLK, is "Reverend" Fred Phelps, of the "Westboro Baptist Church" which is actually not what you and I would call a Church, but is rather Mr Phelps's Private residence, where the "congregation" is mostly made up of his enormous extended family (He has 13 children, 9 of whom are not (yet) estranged from the family)

Mr. Phelps is, of course, famous for Hating, loudly and passionately, a rather large percentage of the Earth's Population. If you are not Hated by Fred Phelps, it is only because he has not yet found the time to Hate you specifically. But since he Hates (or claims that God does) the United States, Mexico, Canada, Sweden, and Ireland, as well as all Gay people, and apparently all pastors, regardless of nationality, there is a good chance that you are among the Hated.

Martin Luther King, of course, is not turning 79 tomorrow, because he was gunned down in Memphis almost 40 years ago.

Fred Phelps Still Lives.

Funny ol' World, Ain't it?

Real Life Superpowers

If the Superpowers in Comic Book and Movie Superheroes seem a little unbelievable, It's because real - life superpowers, like these, don't come in as handy for fighting crime.

Actually on second glance I can see where many of these would come in very handy.

Two Words: Oceans. Fourteen.

P.S. - Number 10, Eye-popping man, reminds me of the episode of Earthworm Jim from my childhood in which EWJ fires his sidekick, and is trying out new ones, including "Can-Turn-His Eyelids-Inside-Out-Boy", who not only has a terrible superpower, but an equally terrible name.

Politics, Apologies, And The Nature of Eternity.

Woo, what a catchy title!

Firstly, the apologies are to you, my readers, for not posting very much (or very well) so far this year. I returned from my vacation to plug directly back into my 52-hour workweek (not counting blogging), and I have devoted what other time I have to immersing myself in politics, a subject I have gone on record saying I will not blog about.

I will say this though. We are in the middle (actually, closer to the beginning) of 30 days that will change the history of American Politics, America, and the World, and if you don't care about "All that political stuff", then it is past time for you to start caring. Get Educated, and Get Involved - in that order.

While I don't cover Politics on this blog, I do cover grammatical errors, malaprops, misspellings, and other word nerdiness, so when I heard the story of President Bush's recent "Wreath Laying Ceremony" in Israel a phrase jumped out at me.


Now, How the heck does someone "rekindle" an "eternal" flame? Maybe I am hazy on the nature of Eternity, but if the flame was eternally burning, there would be no need to rekindle it, would there? Did they turn it off just before the ceremony, so that Mr. Bush could re-light it?

If so, that would be like Symbolically planting a tree in someone's memory/honor into the hole from which it had just been dug up!

"This Flame (which I have just turned off and back on again), will burn steadily, forever* in the memory of those Jews who were needlessly and horribly killed in the death camps of the Holocaust"

*until some future evangelical non-Jew needs another photo-op, at which time we will turn it off again.

Maybe "rekindled" doesn't mean what I think it means; I didn't see the ceremony and know very little about it. Can anybody fill me in on what happened? Was it as disrespectful a thing as I think it was?

Bush: Iranian Persian Gulf Incident a

This is Bizarre. This is the wierdest reaction. The facial expressions in this clip are just plain crazy in the context of what he's being asked about.
The President is asked a question, as he should have known he would be, about a Military/paramilitary confrontation that came within a trigger-finger twitch of starting a full scale war with Iran, and he looks at one point like he is trying to stifle a laugh.

Why the heck are you grinning, Mr President? This is not funny.

Seriously, he looks lost in this footage, brain-addled, even. The next 375 days cannot pass quickly enough.

After Thanksmas - Valenpatster!

After the Thanksmas season ends, some people get sad. Some folks look back at The Season, and at their waistlines, and decide that now, with the beginning of the New Year, the time has come for calm and moderation. Not retailers though! For retailers, it's time for - Valenpatster!! The amalgamated celebration of Hearts, Shamrocks, and Bunnies that exists to sell you Chocolate, Beer, and Chocolate, in that order. Also Flowers, More Beer, and Fancy Hats, also in that order.
Seriously, the items in the above picture should not be on store shelves at the same time, and neither should be out in the first week of January.

In Case you were wondering...

My Vacation has been completely totally awesome!

I got to pet a Dolphin! I got to see Sea Lions getting fed! I got to Ride a Segway!!!

I will have a full report sometime tomorrow (I hope), but for those of you keeping tabs on me, I have had  a better time than I was expecting with the dismal weather forecast I was given.

My beachfront Vacation

Dallas - Looooong Layover.

Well, here I am in Dallas, with 3 hours to kill. I thought that I would be able to meet up with a few college friends who live out here, but the designers of D/FW airport failed to include Any Place At All to join non-passengers for a bite to eat on the other side of the Berlin Wall of Airport Security. To make matters worse, the elderly Info booth volunteer who broke this news to me gave me a load of "911 changed everything" crap that I didn't ask for. The nice waitress here at T.G.I. Friday's says I should go check out Terminal D. I guess I will.
A random girl just shouted "Yea Sewanee's Right!" at me. It took me a second to figure out I was wearing my Sewanee T-shirt.

Well, I am through the metal detectors, and my new bionic elbow didn't make a peep. I am stuck here at the gate with the absolute inanity that is 24 hour cable news. I have an hour to kill.

Listen, Enjoy, And Think of Me!

This will be my last post from a Computer until after I have arrived in San Diego. I will be photoblogging by phone along the way, but I wanted to leave you with a musical gift before I departed. I figured that these song could help express what's been on my mind as I head to (Usually) Sunny California to visit my brother.




Just click the words "launch standalone" and listen as you peruse the web. I hope you enjoy it. Who knew there were that many colors of rain, anyway?

DISCLAIMER: Some of these songs are ones I really like, some are just ones I scrounged up that were "on-topic". Please do not take this to be an accurate cross-section of my musical tastes.

Apparently, It ONLY rains in southern California when I have booked Once-in-a-Lifetime trip to a hotel ON THE BEACH, and planned a trip TO SEA WORLD! Thanks a lot, Mother Nature!

5 below (and Snowing!)

It's like Tennessee is trying to MAKE me leave. It is snowing right now, with 20-30MPH winds and the temperature expected to drop to 14 degrees. with a wind chill of 5 below!

I want to go feed some dolphins at Sea World.

I have been told it is supposed to rain in San Diego when I go. I hope it doesn't, but even if it does, it will at least be a nice warm rain compared to this!

Tagline Compendium 2008

Jan wk-1
TDBotD: The Future Is Now... No, Wait... NOW.
About Me: If I Were a Transformer, I would Transform Into a Couch. And Then the Couch Would Transform Into a Bed, Because I Have Extra Double-Transformy Power.

Jan wk-2 (and 3, sorry!)
TDBotD: I am Roaring; Hear Me Roar!
About Me: I'm a Card-Carrying Member of the Human Race, Since 1978.

Jan wk-4
TDBotD: The Blog with So Much Potential, If It Would Just Apply Itself!
About Me: I Was Being Uncool Back When Uncool Wasn't Cool.

Feb wk-1
TDBotD: We Are Dailier Before 5 In The Morning Than Most Blogs Are All Day!
About Me: I've Lost That Lovin' Feelin, and Now It's Gone, Gone, Gone, Woah-woa-wo-oh.

Feb wk-2 (and 3)
TDBotD: Better Than Catnip On A Warm Spring Day.
About Me: If You Rub My Belly And Make A Wish, It Tickles!

Feb wk-4
TDBotD: Even More Sure Than Death and Taxes
About Me: I am a closet fan of the band Creed.

Mar wk-1
TDBotD: A Mixed Blessing, Like a Warm Toilet Seat.
About Me: I Walk The Line, Because You're Mine (And Because The State Trooper Told Me I Had To)

A Perfectly Appropriate Song For Today.

Not Only Is it a Great Song For New Year's Day (And Yes, I considered Posting U2's "New Year's Day"), But it contains the line "D'You Think You Might Come to California?.. I Think You Should"



I Think I Should, Too. I also think that Counting Crows should put out another Album before their fans' kids start college. And Shrek Soundtracks don't count!

Finally! A Portable Hangman !

Have You Ever Wanted to play "Hangman", but were away from the house, or on the road, or the beach, and you hadn't packed your full size "Hangman" set, because it was just too unwieldy to carry around?

Well Now, for only 12 Dollars and 50 cents, you can have all the fun of playing "Hangman" On the Go with a convenient Travel Version!



Previously, to play hangman, you would have had to buy an Ink Pen. Or a Pencil.*

Ink pens, like the ones pictured below, can cost more than 150 dollars! Remember, You can't spell "Expensive" without "pens". And Pencils? Dont even get me started! The Broken points, the sharpening, the eraser holes in your Newspaper Crossword... Who needs that kind of hassle? I know I don't!

The Travel Hangman set costs only $12.50, and works without any pen or pencil required!** So buy a Travel Magnetic Hangman Set Today!


*If you are on the beach, you could just use your finger to write in the sand. But who needs that hassle?
**Pen or Pencil (as well as paper) may be required for scorekeeping. Check with your local Hangman Regulating Authority for details.


(Special Thanks to My Dad, Tom Gibson, for bringing this product to my attention. And thanks even more for not buying me one for Christmas.)